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Are you ready for another year of pretending to be a responsible parent? Well, get your fake smiles and empty promises ready because here are 10 questions that will make it seem like you actually give a damn about your kids.
How many times did you ignore your child’s needs last year?
In this new year, let’s aim for an even higher number! Remember, the more times you dismiss their wants and desires, the better chance they have at becoming self-sufficient adults who don’t rely on anyone. It’s called tough love!
What excuses can you come up with to avoid spending quality time with your children?
We all know how exhausting it is to engage with our little bundles of joy. So why not brainstorm some creative excuses to dodge those family game nights or school events? Your kids will appreciate the effort… or maybe not.
How many times can you blame technology for your lack of involvement?
The digital age has given us the perfect scapegoat for our parental shortcomings. So go ahead and blame smartphones, tablets, and video games for stealing away precious bonding moments. It’s much easier than taking responsibility!
Can you convince yourself that buying expensive gifts makes up for emotional neglect?
Show your love through material possessions! Who needs emotional support when there are fancy gadgets and designer clothes? Just remember: money can’t buy happiness… but it sure does distract from neglect.
What strategies do you have in place to prioritize work over family time?
Your career should always come first, right? Make sure to strategize ways to put in extra hours at the office while conveniently forgetting about important milestones in your child’s life. They’ll understand… or maybe they won’t.
How many times can you avoid difficult conversations about feelings and emotions?
Avoiding emotional discussions is an art form, and as a parent, it’s your duty to master it. So when your child wants to talk about their fears or anxieties, just change the subject or pretend like you didn’t hear them. Problem solved!
Can you make empty promises without feeling any guilt?
Promises are meant to be broken, especially when it comes to parenting! Make grandiose commitments that you have no intention of keeping. It’s all part of the game called “letting your kids down.”
What excuses will you use for not attending school events?
Your kid has another boring school play? Perfect opportunity for some creative excuse-making! From sudden illnesses to urgent work meetings, there are endless ways to dodge those tedious events that showcase your child’s talents.
How many times can you blame lack of sleep for being an absent parent?
Sleep deprivation is a universal struggle for parents, but why not use it as an excuse for disengagement? After all, who needs quality time with their children when they could be catching up on precious shut-eye?
Can you convince yourself that social media likes equate to good parenting?
In this digital age, validation from strangers on social media is what truly matters. So go ahead and prioritize posting cute pictures of your kids over actually spending time with them. Remember: likes equal love!
Conclusion
In this new year, let’s continue our tradition of half-hearted parenting and prioritizing our own desires above our children’s well-being. Because who needs engaged parenting when you can just pretend to care? Cheers to another year of faking it!
